Thank you for the kind words! You're absolutely right - health comes first. I hope your husband is doing well now after his surgery.

I'm sorry to hear about your heart issues, but you're asking all the right questions. Based on what others have shared here, it sounds like withdrawing your application is definitely feasible since you're well within the 12-month window and haven't received payments yet. The once-in-a-lifetime restriction is something I wasn't aware of either - that's crucial information that makes this decision more significant. Given your medical situation and the substantial treatment costs you're facing, it might make sense to withdraw now, focus on your health, and potentially reapply closer to your FRA when you'd get higher monthly benefits. The 8% delayed retirement credits mentioned earlier could really add up, especially if you're looking at ongoing medical expenses where a higher monthly payment would be beneficial. Have you calculated what your benefit amount would be at 67 versus what you'd get now at 64? That comparison might help inform your decision.

As someone who went through this exact situation two years ago, I can confirm what others have said - the monthly test only applies in your first year of benefits. The key is being proactive about reporting. I kept a simple spreadsheet tracking my monthly earnings projections and would call SSA by the 15th of any month I expected to exceed the limit. Yes, getting through is a pain, but it's way better than dealing with overpayment notices later. One tip: SSA considers when you EARN the income, not when you receive payment. So if you close a real estate deal in March but don't get paid until April, it counts toward March's earnings limit. This tripped me up initially. Also, keep detailed records of all your transactions and communications with SSA. You'll need them for tax time and potentially for any disputes. The system is confusing but manageable once you understand the rules.

This thread has been incredibly helpful! I'm in a similar situation - started collecting at 62 last year and work freelance graphic design with very unpredictable income. One thing I learned the hard way: SSA also counts estimated quarterly tax payments as part of determining your monthly earnings for self-employment income. So if you pay estimated taxes in January for Q4 of the previous year, they might allocate some of that income to January even though you actually earned it months earlier. I'd recommend setting up a my Social Security account online if you haven't already. You can report work activity changes there without having to call, and it keeps a record of what you've reported. It's been a lifesaver for managing my variable income reporting. Also, real estate commissions can be tricky because of when deals close vs when you actually did the work. I'd suggest tracking both the date you earned the commission (contract signing/deal completion) AND when you receive payment, just to be safe when reporting to SSA.

Just wanted to add another perspective here - I work as a benefits coordinator and see this situation frequently. The deeming rules can be really harsh, especially for guardians who step up to care for disabled children. A few additional things to keep in mind: 1. The deeming calculation uses a specific formula that subtracts allowances for you, your spouse, and your other children before applying the deemed amount to your niece's case. 2. If your niece has her own income (like from a special needs trust or other sources), that gets factored in too. 3. Sometimes there's a delay in SSA updating their records about household composition changes, which can affect the calculation. I'd strongly recommend getting that detailed breakdown others mentioned, and also consider consulting with a disability attorney who specializes in SSI cases if the numbers still don't make sense. Many offer free consultations and can spot calculation errors that might not be obvious to us non-experts. Your niece is lucky to have someone advocating for her - don't give up if something seems off with the math!

I went through something very similar when I became guardian of my nephew last year. The deeming calculation is incredibly frustrating because it assumes you have more disposable income than you actually do after taking on a disabled child's care. What really helped me was creating a detailed monthly budget showing all of his disability-related expenses - not just medical copays, but things like specialized equipment, transportation to appointments, respite care, etc. When I presented this to SSA along with requesting the calculation breakdown, they found they had missed some exclusions. Also, don't forget that as his guardian, you might be able to claim him as a dependent on your taxes and potentially qualify for certain credits that could help offset the reduced SSI payment. The system is definitely not set up well for guardianship situations, but keep advocating - there might be more room to work with the numbers than it initially appears.

I went through this same situation last year and found that the timing really depends on your specific SSA office. What I ended up doing was calling the national SSA number (1-800-772-1213) and asking them to note in my file that I wanted tax withholding set up as soon as my benefits were approved. Then I mailed my W-4V form with a cover letter referencing that phone call and my application number. When my first payment came through, the withholding was already in place. It might be worth trying this approach - get it documented in your file early, even if the form itself can't be processed until approval.

I'm going through this exact same process right now and the conflicting information is so frustrating! After reading all these responses, I think I'm going to take a multi-pronged approach: 1) Call the national SSA line to get a note added to my file requesting immediate withholding setup upon approval, 2) Submit my W-4V form by mail with a cover letter referencing my application number, and 3) If possible, schedule an in-person appointment to confirm everything is properly documented. It seems like being proactive and using multiple channels gives the best chance of getting withholding set up from the first payment. Thanks everyone for sharing your experiences - this is exactly the kind of real-world advice you can't find on the official SSA website!

To actually answer your main question - you should take whichever benefit is higher. If your own benefit is higher than 50% of your ex's, take your own. If 50% of his is higher than your own, take the spousal benefit. The SSA should actually give you the higher amount automatically if you were married for at least 10 years before divorcing. Based on what you've shared, it sounds like your own benefit is the higher one. Just remember that taking your benefit doesn't affect his at all - he'll still get whatever he's entitled to regardless of what you claim.

One more thing to keep in mind - since you're turning 66 in three months, you're reaching your Full Retirement Age (FRA). This is actually perfect timing because you can claim your full benefit without any early retirement reductions. If you had claimed earlier, your benefit would have been permanently reduced. Also, even though you're choosing your own benefit over the ex-spouse benefit now, you might want to check back in a few years. If your ex-husband passes away before you do, you could potentially switch to a survivor benefit based on his record, which would be 100% of his benefit amount instead of just the 50% spousal amount. Just something to keep in the back of your mind for future planning. The SSA agent should have explained all this to you, but sometimes they rush through the details. Make sure you get everything in writing when you file!