Just want to add something that helped us - my husband is a SAHD and we made him an authorized user on my business credit card. He uses it for household purchases that support my work (like when he picks up office supplies or runs work-related errands). This doesn't create any tax breaks directly but it helps him build credit history while technically contributing to the family business. Might be worth considering if credit building is also on your mind.

First off, don't feel guilty about being a stay-at-home dad! You're providing invaluable care and saving your family thousands in childcare costs. Beyond what others have mentioned about the Child Tax Credit and dependent care options, here are a few additional things to consider: 1. **Educational Credits** - If you're taking any courses or certifications while home (even online ones that could help with future employment), you might qualify for education tax credits. 2. **Health Savings Account (HSA)** - If your wife's employer offers an HSA with her health plan, you can contribute pre-tax dollars and use them for family medical expenses, including over-the-counter items for the kids. 3. **State-specific credits** - Many states have their own child tax credits or dependent care credits that supplement federal ones. Check what your state offers. 4. **Documentation is key** - Keep receipts for ANY childcare expenses, even occasional ones like summer camps, drop-in daycare, or babysitting while your wife works late. These all potentially qualify for the Child and Dependent Care Credit. The tax code is complex, so don't hesitate to consult a tax professional who can review your specific situation. What you're doing has tremendous value - both financially and for your children's development!

I'm a tax preparer and see these situations frequently. The good news is you're not looking at taxable income here. When property damage compensation doesn't exceed your original cost basis (what you paid for the car), it's not taxable - you're just being made whole, not profiting. The W-9 is standard procedure for any business payment over $600, regardless of whether it's taxable. Think of it like their insurance policy - they collect tax info on everyone they pay just in case. They may or may not issue a 1099, but even if they do, it doesn't change the tax treatment. Here's my advice: Keep your purchase documentation, settlement paperwork, and any photos of the damage. If you do get a 1099, most tax software has a section for "other income" where you can enter the amount and then offset it with "casualty loss reimbursement - not taxable." The net effect is zero additional tax. Don't overthink this - the IRS understands that replacing destroyed property isn't income. You bought a car for $28K, someone destroyed it, and they're giving you $18.5K to replace it. You're actually out money, not gaining anything taxable.

Don't let this situation stress you out too much - you're handling it exactly right by asking questions upfront. I went through something very similar when a contractor's truck damaged my driveway and fence. They paid me directly and requested a W-9, which initially freaked me out too. Here's what I learned: The W-9 is just their way of covering their bases for any payment over $600. It doesn't automatically mean you'll get a 1099, and even if you do, it doesn't automatically mean taxable income. In your case, since you're receiving less than what you originally paid for the car, this is clearly compensation for property damage, not income. The most important thing is documentation. Keep your original purchase paperwork, any photos of the damage, the settlement agreement, and especially any communication that specifically describes this as property damage compensation. I'd also suggest getting something in writing from them (even just an email) confirming that this payment is specifically for property damage to replace your totaled vehicle. If they do send a 1099, don't panic. It's actually quite common in these situations, and tax software like TurboTax handles it well. You'll report the 1099 amount and then offset it with an explanation that it's non-taxable property damage compensation. The net tax effect is zero. You're not trying to avoid paying legitimate taxes - you're just ensuring you don't pay taxes on money that replaces something you already owned and lost. The IRS completely understands this distinction.

Does your divorce lawyer know about this? Mine was super helpful with tax questions during my divorce. Lawyers usually keep detailed records of all financial exchanges during proceedings so they might have documentation that would help prove what you actually received.

You're absolutely right to be concerned about this situation. The key thing to understand is that without a formal spousal support agreement in place during 2023, those payments don't qualify as deductible alimony for your ex, which means they're also not taxable income for you. Here's what I'd recommend: First, gather all your bank statements from 2023 and document exactly what you received - dates, amounts, and methods of payment. This creates your own paper trail. Second, consider adding a disclosure statement to your tax return explaining that you received informal financial assistance during divorce proceedings but had no legal support agreement in place until 2024. If your ex does incorrectly claim these deductions and gets audited, having your own documentation ready will protect you. The IRS will be able to see that there was no formal agreement requiring these payments, which makes his deductions invalid. You won't be penalized for his mistakes as long as you've been transparent about your situation. Keep all communications you have about these payments too - texts, emails, anything that shows they were voluntary help rather than court-ordered support. This documentation will be invaluable if questions arise later.

Just want to clarify something - Credit Karma is now officially Cash App for banking. They migrated all accounts last year. So you're actually looking for when Cash App processes IRS deposits. I had a 2/28 DDD and got mine at 10:15pm on 2/27. The deposit notification came from Cash App, not Credit Karma.

I can share my recent experience with Credit Karma/Cash App for tax refunds. Had a 3/7 DDD this year and received my deposit at 11:47 PM on 3/6 - so about 12 hours before the official date. One thing I learned is that Credit Karma's customer service can actually tell you if they've received the ACH transfer from Treasury, even if it hasn't posted to your account yet. If you call and they confirm they have the funds, it usually posts within 2-4 hours. For your 3/12 DDD, I'd expect to see it sometime late evening on 3/11 or early morning 3/12. The key is that once Treasury initiates the transfer (usually around 8:30 PM Eastern the day before DDD), Credit Karma processes pretty quickly compared to traditional banks.

Has anyone here actually gone back and forth between W-2 employment and self-employment? I'm curious how bad the "tax shock" really is when you make the switch. After 12 years at a company, I'm thinking about going freelance in the same field but worried about the tax situation.

Great breakdown! As someone who made the switch from W-2 to self-employment three years ago, I can confirm your math is spot on. The psychological aspect you mentioned is huge - when you're an employee, you never see that 7.65% employer contribution, so it feels "free," but it's really just part of your total compensation package. One thing that helped me was setting up a separate tax savings account where I automatically transfer 30% of every payment I receive. That way, when quarterly estimated taxes come due, I'm not scrambling to find the money. The SE tax might feel more painful because you're writing the check, but you're also gaining control over deductions, retirement contributions, and business expenses that employees rarely get to leverage. The freedom and potential tax advantages of self-employment often outweigh that initial sticker shock once you get your systems in place!